Thursday, May 28, 2015

'Jaws' Swims Back to Theaters for 40th Anniversary


As weird as it might sound, Jaws was one of the first movies I was obsessed with growing up. In fact, some of my earliest childhood memories involve Steven Spielberg's seminal aquatic nightmare, when my mom would ask me to go into the kitchen and make her a peanut butter and jelly sandwich during the goriest scenes, just to get me out of the room (I always made it back too early). Jaws even drifted into playtime for me, when my toy shark munched on G.I. Joes and gave me the chance to perfect Robert Shaw's death gargles as I shoved Shipwreck into its gaping rubber maw.

Despite all that, I turned out perfectly well-adjusted, right?

Forty years after ushering in the era of the summer blockbuster in 1975, Jaws is heading back into theaters for a limited run. Fathom Events will hold screenings on Sunday, June 21 and Wednesday June 24 at 2 p.m. and 7 p.m. local time at theaters across the United States. To mourn that little Kintner boy at a theater near you, pre-order your tickets by clicking here.

Wednesday, May 27, 2015

Why I Can't Stop Thinking About 'Mad Max: Fury Road'


During a much-needed day off, I capped off a day of relaxation and self-reflection with George Miller's Mad Max: Fury Road, a reboot of sorts for the influential trilogy of 1980s Mel Gibson flicks. I've never seen a Mad Max film before, and judging by what I'd heard about this new installment (starring Bane himself, Tom Hardy), I wouldn't need to do much homework before diving into this high-octane race through a post-apocalyptic desert wasteland. Instead, I strolled into the 3:40 showing at Bow Tie Cinemas' Regent 8 in South Norwalk with only the faintest knowledge of the film, expecting little more than loud explosions and steel-bending car wrecks, and what I got was a whole lot more. Whether or not it was a good choice on a day that was supposed to be relaxing is another issue.

Fury Road isn't a fun movie, necessarily, and definitely isn't what most people are looking for in a summer blockbuster. Max's world is a tense and grotesque one, and it's not one I was entirely comfortable experiencing for the film's two-hour's running time. That being said, I loved what this film brought to the table. Here's why it's sticking with me. Spoilers ahead!


  • This film is a love letter to practical filmmaking, using real cars, real pyrotechnics and real stunts. CGI was used sparingly, and seldom drew attention to itself. 
  • The villain, Immortan Joe (Hugh Keays-Byrne), is delightfully evil and always interesting to watch on-screen thanks to some superb makeup work. There's that dedication to practical effects again.
  • The Doof Warrior, who heralds the coming of Immortan Joe's war party with a flame-spewing guitar, is one of the craziest things I've ever seen in a movie. I want him to play my next birthday party.
  • With all of this talk recently about genre flicks not giving women their due, it's arguable that the women in Fury Road are its strongest characters, namely Charlize Theron's awesomely named Imperator Furiosa. In fact, Furiosa has more bearing on the plot than even Max himself.
  • The scene where Immortan Joe's son, Rictus Erectus (former WWE Superstar Nathan Jones), meets his baby brother is one of the most nightmarish things I've seen in a movie in quite some time. 
  • I dug that Immortan Joe's soldiers, or "war boys," had a viking-esque code of honor, with promises of Valhalla for those who make the ultimate sacrifice in battle. This made it easier to sympathize with Nux (Nicholas Hoult) later in the movie.
  • This movie shows more than it tells. We don't get a ton of exposition once things get rolling, and the film isn't really interested in slowing down to explain why things are the way they are in this universe. There's a lot of world-building going on, but you'll barely notice it. That's rare.
  • Fury Road isn't beholden to the original films, nor does it end with a tease for sequels. This movie truly stands alone, making you actually want a sequel before you're guaranteed one. 

Friday, May 22, 2015

Coldplay Unveils 'Game of Thrones: The Musical' for Red Nose Day



"You know nothing, Chris Martin."

For the Red Nose Day poverty-fighting charity event, Coldplay unveiled "Game of Thrones: The Musical," a faux documentary chronicling the band's attempt at creating a Broadway musical based on the George R. R. Martin fantasy-turned-HBO phenomenon.

The 12-minute clip is pretty fantastic, and it's refreshing to see so many of the cast members having a blast when the show itself has gotten so dark lately. I know it will never actually happen, but I need to see Emilia Clark perform a full version of "Rastafarian Targaryen" in the very near future.

Watch the full video below. For more on Red Nose Day, click here.

Thursday, May 21, 2015

Watch the Powerful Trailer for 'Batkid Begins'


Wow. I don't think I was ready for this when I hit that "play" button. Back in 2013, a small boy with leaukemia, Miles Scott, was given the opportunity to save San Francisco from the forces of evil as "Batkid" thanks to Make-A-Wish and more than 25,000 good-hearted folks from the Bay Area and beyond.

Now, Miles' journey as a diminutive Dark Knight is chronicled in the forthcoming Warner Bros. documentary Batkid Begins, which opens in select cities on June 26. Watch the just-released trailer below.


Wednesday, May 20, 2015

Is Matthew McConaughey the New Green Goblin?


You know what I like about comic book characters, man? I get older, they stay the same age. Alright, alright, alright.

The Spider-Man rumor mill seems to be in full swing these days. After various media outlets reported that Ender's Game actor Asa Butterfield will be the Webslinger in the Marvel Cinematic Universe starting with next year's Captain America: Civil War, it's now rumored that Matthew McConaughey is being eyed to play Norman Osborn/Green Goblin in the forthcoming Spider-Man solo flick in 2017.

MConaughey has been pretty good at playing a total slimeball since 1993's Dazed and Confused, so he shouldn't have too much difficulty stepping into the role of a billionaire-turned-criminal mastermind. What do you think? Would McConaughey be an "interstellar" choice, or is this reboot already a "failure to launch"?

Yes, I'm Still Here

Wow, has it really been two weeks since my last blog post? Time flies when, well, time flies no matter what kind of time you might be having.

Speaking of time, I haven't had much of it to myself lately, which is actually a pretty good problem to have if you think about it. Nevertheless, whenever something awesome has happened in the geek world, recently I've been stricken with pangs of guilt. "Should I carve out time to blog about that? Would anyone care if I didn't?" As it turns out, I've just realized, that latter question doesn't and shouldn't really matter.

Look, I'm well aware that I'm not exactly killing it on here in terms of page views, and I never have. Yet, I've always believed in the importance of keeping the pen moving ... or in this case, the keyboard clicking. And my keyboard just hasn't been clicking as much as I would like it to (outside of my full-time job, that is). I want to change that, entirely for myself.

So, consider this a re-up. Expect more of The Wort Report, whether you want it or not.

Tuesday, May 5, 2015

Jar Jar Binks Joins 'Star Wars: The Force Awakens'

Okay, so maybe that headline is a tad misleading, but haven't you ever wondered what would happen if Jar Jar Binks popped up in J.J. Abrams' Star Wars: The Force Awakens? No? Well, Michael Murdock of MichaelLovesMovies.com did, and he's unleashed his unimaginable horror upon us all. Dissen berry, berry bad.

Watch "The Binks Awakens" below.

New Acquisition: Marvel Legends 'Age of Ultron' Hulk Action Figure


"Hey, big guy. Sun's getting real low."

The Internet is going crazy after Joss Whedon quit Twitter amidst misguided criticism of his treatment of Black Widow in Avengers: Age of Ultron. Instead of getting wrapped up in all of that nonsense, however, I'd rather celebrate the awesomeness of the movie and its merchandise, namely the amazing Marvel Legends Avengers: Age of Ultron Hulk action figure from Hasbro. 

This highly detailed rendition of everyone's favorite green rage monster is HUGE, practically bursting from its packaging, and it towers over many other figures in this line. Now I just need to pick up the rest of the figures in this series so I can assemble Thanos, because toy collecting is a neverending struggle. Oh, well.

Disney Confirms 'Indiana Jones' Sequel


May the 5th Indiana Jones movie be with you.

Okay, it doesn't have the same ring as "May the 4th be with you," but I imagine there will be a Star Wars Day-esque celebration on the horizon for the Indiana Jones franchise after Lucasfilm president Kathleen Kennedy confirmed to Vanity Fair that a Disney sequel is in the works for the bullwhip-toting archaeologist. 

Another Indiana Jones film "will one day be made inside this company," Kennedy said.  "When it will happen, I'm not quite sure. We haven't started working on a script yet, but we are talking about it."

Whether this film will star Harrison Ford or a franchise newcomer such as long-rumored Indy apparent Chris Pratt remains to be seen. I feel like the last film, Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, has aged worse than any film made over the last decade, so I hope Disney turns back the clock and recasts the character, or at least produces a fifth film that doesn't acknowledge the last one. Mutt Williams who?

For the full story, click here